As I was driving out of the parking lot at Target, I did not scream and slam on the breaks when I discovered an enormous spider - in a web - next to my steering wheel in the van. (How on earth did a spider get into the van to begin with, let alone have time to fabricate a fancy little home for itself next to my steering wheel?)
So of course, when the van was stopped, I didn't stop and get out and stare hopelessly at the spider and wonder how we'd ever get home. I definitely didn't look around for a man to come and help me because, afterall, I'm a proud woman who doesn't need a man's help with such things... right? And I certainly didn't drag my six year old out of the back seat and give her a piece of toilet paper and instruct her to do away with the creepy, leggy thing. She's a six year old girl for heaven's sake. She shouldn't have to kill bugs for her mama!
In the end, it wasn't me that ended up using a kid's book to smash the little booger into oblivion on the dash board while I let out a high-pitched shriek. C'mon now, I'm more mature than that.