Remember in the Little House books* when Laura slaps Mary for saying "Golden hair is lots prettier than brown," and then she gets a spanking for it? And afterwards, Laura asks Pa if he thinks golden hair is prettier, and then all is made better when Pa points out that his hair is brown, too.
I totally get it. There's something alluring about little girls with blonde hair and blue eyes. And at the risk of sounding biased, I think she's pretty darn beautiful too. But for heaven's sake, brown hair and blue eyes are just as pretty!
People comment on babies and children. It's what they do - especially old people. They love to tell you how blessed you are, how cute they are, how much fun you must have. And I love that.
What I don't love is when someone sees Cora and says, "Oh! What a beautiful little girl you have! Just look at those eyes! And her pretty golden hair! Well, aren't you just a precious little doll!" and then they look at my seven year old and say, "And hi there."
I used to think it was a little bit rude. Then I found it slightly more annoying. Now it eats at me and I get pretty darn worked up about it.
Yes, The Toddler has rather striking features, and blue eyes and blonde hair are considered "beautiful" in our society. Add to that the fact that two is a very cute age, clothes made for two year olds are absolutely adorable, and my two year old in particular is very good at doing cute things to get the attention of old ladies standing in long lines.
The Older One is seven. Seven is not a particularly cute age, and anyone who has a picture of themselves at age seven should already be aware of that. Seven is the first year of the Awkward Stage. It's also just about the age that little girls begin to develop certain sensitivities and insecurities. In my opinion, she's gorgeous and beautiful and perfect. But there are some things that a mom can say that just don't take the place of when others say them.
I wish people would keep their opinions to themselves sometimes. I appreciate the compliments and all, but I hate the way it makes my precious Oldest girl feel, and I can see in her eyes that it hurts more than just a little.
*We're still reading the Little House books, so please forgive me the constant references to them. At the rate we're reading them, I'll keep on making these constant references for the next three years.