Wednesday, May 28, 2008


My birth mother called last night, soon after I'd read an email she'd sent. My biological grandfather, her dad, had a stroke, is unconscious, and they don't expect him to recover. Even if he regains consciousness, he would be paralyzed. My grandmother made the decision to remove him from life support, which will likely be done today. I didn't know him well at all - we'd only met maybe three times. I didn't meet them until I was 20 years old, and they didn't know I existed before that. He had very kind eyes though, that's the one thing I'll always remember.

And yesterday, my mom told me that my dad's mom isn't doing well... we've known that for awhile, but apparently she's getting worse. She suffers from alzheimer's pretty bad, as well as a whole host of other general medical problems. And her husband, my step-grandfather, has skin cancer.

I'm not really close to any of these people. I care very much about their well being, and it makes me very sad that I'm going to lose Dwight (my bio-mom's dad). But it makes me sad too that I didn't know them better. My dad's dad passed away a few months ago, and I never really knew him either. I have lots of grandparents, and even one great grandmother still, but I'm not terribly close to any of them. My mom's parents live here in GJ, and we see them occasionally, but they still aren't like those 'real' grandparents that kids grow up being completely attached to, ya know? That's what makes me the saddest.

I'm glad it's different with my mom. My little girls see her three or more times a week, they all adore one another. Chloe (and Cora as she gets older) will know exactly what kind of woman their Grammy is, so that when her time does come (hopefully many, many years down the road) they will have wonderful memories to hold dear for the rest of their lives. And when I'm a grandma, I hope it's the same.


Enough depressing stuff. Here are a couple pics of my current WIP's:

The zigzag lace scarf:

It's slow going on size four needles and sportweight yarn, but it's turning out to be a rather pleasant knit. I don't make scarves very often. This one is intended to be a gift, though I'm almost tempted to keep it because I love the way it's turning out! It's hard to see much detail in the yarn in the pic, but it's navy blue with flecks of red, white, and a bit of grey. It's a silk/lambswool combination. Absolutely lovely to knit with.

And this is the sweater currently on the needles:

I finished one of the front pieces in two days. It should be a quick knit once the scarf is finished. isn't that colorway splendid? I love it.


Dani said...

I was lucky enough to be close to my grandparents growing up. My mom's dad died when I was 4, so I don't remember him, but my mom's mom is still here, and my girls know her and love her very much. My dad's parents died when I was in middle/high school, and while they were alive, we were pretty close to them as well. That's why it was so important for me to stay close to my family. Mark's family isn't close and doesn't do a lot of "family" stuff, my family is the opposite.

Kim said...

I feel for you when it comes to the family stuff. My son is really close to my parents, he sees them almost every day, but he only sees my mother-in-law a couple times a year, due to distance, and he's only met my father-in-law once (he left when my husband was only 6 months old). My mother-in-law adores him, but due to distance and money, it's hard to see her very much. My father-in-law first met Andrew on his 2nd birthday, so I'm hoping to develop a relationship there. My dad is estranged from his 2 brothers and 2 sisters and my mom from 1 of her brothers, and that makes me sad, because family means a lot to me. I'm hoping to keep my family close and hopefully as Andrew gets older, we can draw everyone together again.