Mason-Dixon Knitting

I checked out this book from the library. What a pleasure it has been to read! I usually get knitting books so I can ooh and ahh over the patterns, but this one has actual reading too! I'm loving it. These two women who wrote the book are flippin' hilarious, and there is enough knitting related humor in the book that I just keep opening it up to read more.

A Timeline of Knitting History

1595 BC: Woman waiting for Hittite husband to return from sacking of Babylon picks up string and two sticks, begins "Support Our Troops" scarf.

1595 BC: (two minutes later) Woman drops first stitch, utters first curse word related to knitting

AD 1215: Woman waiting in lobby for husband to finish reading the Magna Carta picks up string and piece of wire left over from husband's armor; invents the fishing gansey

AD 1215: (ten minutes later) Husband comes out, says, "What are you doing, milady?" Woman says "Shut up, I'm counting."

1346: Knitting guilds form. From the charter: "For the attainment of wages and goode skilles. If ye be a male, and ye knit, ye shalle joinne. If ye be a female, buzze offe."

1620: PIlgrim ladies plan knitting circle, discover lack of yarn shops in the New World, take up decorative shoe buckle-making instead.

1793: Eli Whitney invents the cotton gin

1896: Siobahn Ogwnngyfleioghnn knits so poorly that she accidentally discovers the cable stitch.

1924: Kleenex invented

1924 (one hour later): Mildred Farnwinkle of Dubuque, Iowa, completes first Kleenex box cozy.

1968: Janis Joplin wears crochet vest at Woodstock. Jimi Hendrix is overheard saying "Nice vest, Janis. I love that colorway."

1997: Eyelash yarn invented. On the Isle ofLewis, Alice Starmore weeps into her twenty-eight shade Fair Isle sleeve.

One other quick little quote: "My house isn't picky: It doesn't care if that afghan is a little too big or the wrong color. It is the most forgiving recipient of stuff I knit, and it will wear it until I get tired of looking at it."

Aren't they great? Seriously, if you knit, you should find this book and read it. Some great patterns, and some wonderful humor!